An Eagle in the Morning and Stars at Night

I've been trying to pay better attention to the ways the Lord reveals Himself to me in my daily life. This is what happened today.

This morning, I was out walking down the road that runs east/west past our house. I was talking to the Lord about the ongoing struggle of dealing with the same weaknesses over and over. Was I complaining just a little? Well, maybe. I looked up and directly overhead was a lone eagle soaring on the wind, heading north toward the creek. I watched him as he flew effortlessly and wondered what it would be like to be able to join him up there and experience the freedom and distance from all that troubles us who are earthbound here on the ground. Immediately, Isaiah 40:31 came to mind, a very familiar verse to all of us, but a reminder I needed to hear this morning.

They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not get weary; they shall walk and not faint.

There was enough help and hope in those words to keep my on course, to silence my complaints, to speed me on in pursuit of walking with God. I am listening, Lord.

Then tonight, I went out to feed the dogs after dark, and as they always do when it is clear, the stars drew my gaze to the heavens. I love to look at the stars. The absolute best place to look at them is from the top of a mountain in the desert where the air is thin and very, very clear. They are overwhelmingly awesome from there. But, I was here at home on flat ground and they were still awesome. I can never look at them without thinking about the words to an old Phil Keaggy song:

Look at the stars, Abraham and believe I AM. Can you count stars, Abraham, or the grains of sand?........

The point of the song is that the number of the stars is like the number of the children of Abraham, and I am one because I am in Christ. He is faithful to His promises, even those given so long ago to Abraham. I am one proof of His promise-keeping faithfulness. God knows my name. He knew I would be His on that night long ago when Abraham stood in the desert night and chose to believe the vastness of God's promise to him.

God's love speaks in so many ways. I want my heart to be open to hear Him more and more clearly as the days go by.

To My Dear Family

I am a little slow. . . . .

Lane, I'll start with you since you were the first to arrive. Thank you for coming when you did. Mama was so glad when she knew you were coming. She knew how much you loved her, that you would do whatever it took to get here. She told me, "Lane loves me. He really loves me." I understood what she meant because my sons love me like that. She was so proud of you - your integrity and honesty and will to work hard, of the man you have become. Thank you for being with Daddy all week. I could rest, knowing you were there.

Chelley, I am so glad you came when you did. Your gentle strength helped hold us all together. I'm glad you were there with Lani when Mama left. If I remember right, you are the one who suggested we read Scripture to her, and that led to that very special time of singing and praying and Mark's beautiful song. . . . . Thank you!

Robin, My heart tells me that you will miss her most of all. She was your confidant, a voice of love and truth and sanity in this messed up world. Our days will not be the same without her. But you have her strength to make the Lord your dwelling place all your days. I love you.

Mark, you, alone out of all of us, have met death before. Yet your faith shines all the brighter through your pain. The song you sang at the foot of Mama's bed (and again at the funeral) was so beautiful. Thank you. We all wanted to love her with our hands and our voices. You did that extraordinarily well. I will not forget it.

Kathy, it is so hard to believe it is all over and she is really gone. Even though we knew it was coming, the reality of it sinks in slowly. Thank you for putting your creative energy into the slide show. It was so well done and included pictures of Mama I had never seen or did not remember. It was a gift to all of us. I am looking forward to the memory book you are working on.

Lani, I am so glad you were here. Singing and praying and reading Scripture around Mama's bed, knowing her heart was hearing our love even though her body showed no sign. I'm glad you were there when she left. I wonder if we are ever old enough to lose our mothers? Her death leaves a vacuum that no one else can fill. But, we do not grieve as those who have no hope. . . . .

Chip, thank you so much for coming. Your presence was a rock for me, your faith solid and immoveable. You have weathered the storms and you stand strong, providing shelter and safety to those you love. Thanks for letting me lean on you and cry.

And Daddy, dear, dear Daddy, I will never forget the way Mama took your face in her hands and pulled you close to love you on that last day. That is a precious memory I will cherish all my days. You loved her very well. She loved you all her days. I pray that I may love as you have.

Learning from Abraham

I'm a very sporadic blogger! But here goes........

I just started a new Bible study on the life of Abraham. These thoughts came out of the first day's lesson.

When the Lord calls us to follow Him to new places, when He prods us to leave the encumbrances behind, He gives us His promises to nourish our hearts and fuel our obedience. Just like Abraham. God called him to leave everything familiar and move out to a destination yet to be revealed. But in the same breath, He promised to show him where to go, He promised to bless him, to fight his enemies, and to make him a blessing. We are not orphans. We are sons and daughters. He will never leave us or forsake us. He has given us His Spirit in our hearts, guaranteeing our final destination. I, for one, am moving out to follow Him.

I'm excited to see where the Lord will take me through this study in the next few weeks.

My testimony from Haiti

This is an article I wrote for our church newsletter this month which focused on reports from the Haiti trip. I wanted to share it here too.

I signed up to go to Haiti, mostly because all the other members of my family were going and I did not want to be left out. However, I think deep in my heart was a core desire to see God do something powerful and real.

Many of you know my testimony. I grew up knowing about God and salvation and worship and loving Jesus from my earliest memories. I consciously gave my heart to Jesus as a young girl in Sunday School class. I knew what it meant to have an intimate relationship with Jesus and walk in the joy of my salvation. When Scott and I married, we had it as our goal to someday serve overseas as full-time missionaries. So in 1989, we took our family to Senegal, West Africa for one school year as associate missionaries. It was a difficult, wonderful, stretching year for us. We sensed the Lord leading us to complete the New Tribes training and go back full time. But it was not as easy as we had hoped. We struggled through the first part of the training and the leadership graciously passed us. But when we got to the second and final phase, I just could not go on. And so we left and came back to Nebraska. I remember thinking (with all the attending feelings of failure and guilt) on the drive back that I had totally blown it, both with my husband and with the Lord.

I did not realize it then, but something changed in my relationship with the Lord at that point. It was not the same. During all the years between then and now, I have struggled in my walk with the Lord. I knew He loved me. I knew He forgave me. But I felt unworthy and I often wondered if He had any further purpose for my life. Several times in the last few months I have said to the Lord, “Lord, I feel like I’m drowning, like I’m just barely keeping my head above water. I need You to do something.” And that’s where I was when I went to Haiti.

Each day we were in Haiti, we had team meetings both in the morning and each evening -- a time of prayer and praise and worship, for sharing events from the day and thoughts from Scripture or anything the Lord was saying to us. While we were worshiping and quiet before the Lord, He began to show me that I was believing a lie. I was believing that I had forfeited my rights as a true child of God by my sin and failure. I believed that I had forfeited my freedom in Christ by my behavior. But in all the years of bondage I didn’t know what was wrong with me until the Holy Spirit revealed it in my heart and mind on a rooftop in Haiti. I didn’t say anything to anyone that night, but I spent a lot of time through the night thinking and praying about what the Lord had revealed. I realized it was true and that many areas of my life had been affected by the lie I had believed. I repented and asked the Lord to do His work of making me new.

I felt like a door slammed shut behind me. All of the stuff behind that door no longer has any power over me. Jesus set me free. I knew I had to tell the whole team, both to seal it by saying it out loud and because I wanted the accountability of others knowing what God had done for me. A couple of nights later I shared very briefly what the Lord had shown me and that He had set me free. The whole team gathered round and prayed for me and praised the Lord with me. God sealed His work in my heart that night. I am still discovering all the changes this has made in my life. The first and most precious to me though, is that I can worship the Lord freely – without past failures rearing up and telling me I am unfit to be in His presence. With all my heart, I want to follow Jesus wherever He leads me.

We saw God do many powerful and real things while we were in Haiti. One of them He did for me. I would like to express deep gratitude to all of you who prayed for us while we were in Haiti. God used you to work His work in us.

Book Review

As part of the BethanyHouse Book Review program, I read a new book called Flight to Heaven by Capt. Dale Black. I like books that tell true stories, especially when they are written by the person who had the experiences (autobiography). It is similar to 90 Minutes in Heaven in that Capt. Black had a near-death or death experience. The thing I liked best about this book was the change that took place in his heart and life attitudes as a result of his glimpse of heaven. I would expect such an experience to radically alter a person's life and it did. His story reminds me that the Bible is absolutely true - even the parts that promise things we cannot see or have no way to experience while we are living here. It encourages me to live life with more in view than what I can see with my eyes everyday. I heartily recommend this book to any one who is interested.

30th Anniversary

Today (Monday) is our 30th Anniversary! Scott surprised me by making reservations for a cabin at Niobrara State Park. We've been wanting to go check it out since it is relatively close and we're considering options for our family gathering in September. We had a really wonderful time. It is a beautiful park on the border of Nebraska and South Dakota where the Niobrara River empties into the Missouri River. Because of all the rain we have had this summer, it was lush and green all the way up there. It's not a very big park and we walked some of its roads to reach special attractions like a fishing bridge and the higher lookout points. Thanks to Zeke and Psalm 29, we woke up to a thunderstorm this morning! Which was perfect, I thought. It just added to my enjoyment of the trip. Thank you, Honey, for thinking of it!

Has anyone else had this experience? I quit drinking coffee every morning sometime before Christmas. Instead, I started drinking tea from the The Republic of Tea and also a Chai Tea Latte from Sam's Club. I was very surprised to discover that I started feeling better -- a lot better. I don't wake up with that groggy feeling you have until you drink your coffee. And I have more energy evenly throughout the day. It's great! I don't know whether to attribute it to the lack of coffee or the addition of the tea. But whichever it is, I am thankful! Maybe it's a combination of both. . . .

I finally finished reading The Sacred Meal by Nora Gallagher. I cannot wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone who is seeking a better understanding of the celebration of the Lord’s Supper. The author examines the celebration of Communion from several different angles. She does a very good job of relating the partaking of Communion back to daily living. She is a good story teller, telling many stories from her own life and experience. I kept waiting for her to talk about the foundational truths the Lord’s Supper was given to remember. But she never did. Instead, she related Communion more to the feeding of the 5,000 than to the last supper (p.78). And she never mentions Jesus’ words, “Do this in remembrance of me” (Luke 22:19) Nor does she refer to Paul’s words in I Cor. 11:26: “For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until He comes.” It seemed to me that much of what she had to say was based on her feelings about things and her reasoning about how things might be. I found the book to be too mystical and not Biblically based for me to enjoy it or its message.

A Day Together

Yesterday we spent the day together -- our 4 girls and me. It was a very special day. We didn't do anything out of the ordinary. Ate lunch together. Watched a movie we had all seen before. Talked. Laughed. Loved each other. What beautiful women they have all become! Each one is so different from the others, but they genuinely love and care for each other in a way that instructs my heart to love and accept others better than I do. I am so thankful for the time we had together! Thanks, Girls! I love you!

Family Time Pics

Family Time

Today is our 28th anniversary. We just finished a week of having everyone home (except Rebecca who is off helping orphan African children for 5 weeks; I'll include her email later.) It was great! I love being with our kids and their spouses and our grandkids! What a blessing God has given us! We didn't do anything "memorable" or expensive or unique. We had fun playing in the water in the back yard, jumping on the trampoline, sitting out on the deck, eating together, playing miniature golf -- and, well, just being together. We all tried out Christina's camera to see if a digital SLR might be worth the investment. We spent one afternoon putting in a new window at my parent's house and repainting some of the trim outside. We went with Micah and Allie to look at a house they might be interested in buying if it is still available when the time comes. We remembered the past, talked about the present, and wondered about the future. After Micah and Allie left, we visited the Omaha Zoo and ate at Famous Dave's. For all you who weren't here, I'll post a slide show of our time together. Also, as I promised, here is Rebecca's email from Africa. We missed you, Rebecca!

Hello, all!

Right, so Im typing on a computer with the keys in the wrong place, so were going to make this brief. I am safely in Africa...I LOVE it...I might be back in August :] The trip here was long, but so incredibly worth it. I greatly appreciate all your prayers and look forward to sharing with all of you when I return. Our second camp here in Rwanda starts tomorrow. The first camp was incredibl; you should see the pictures.
God is so good.
My love to you all.
Rebecca

We look forward to our next time together!

Rebecca

Princesses

My two-year old granddaughter made my day yesterday morning! We were getting ready for church; Kylie was already dressed in a little blue spring dress that made her feel like a princess. Whenever she wears a dress she declares, "I a princess!" Well, she saw me coming downstairs with my church dress on and with a most delighted look on her face, she asked, "Grandma, you a princess too?" That's the closest I've ever come to being called a princess by anyone. It was great!
It made me think of one of my favorite "girl" verses in Psalms ~ "The King's daughter is all glorious within. Her clothing is interwoven with gold." (Psalm 45:13) Maybe, when Kylie gets a little older, I'll be able to share that verse with her and help her understand that being a princess is what she is inside, in her character and in her relationship to the King, not what she wears on the outside.

Night in the Hospital

I spent Saturday night in a hospital room holding my week-and-a-half-old granddaughter so her mom and dad could get some sleep. She was on oxygen, had an IV in her hand, and was on two different monitors that kept track of her heart rate, breathing rate, and oxygen levels in her blood. One foot was bandaged where they had taken blood that morning and she had a bandaid on her lower back where they had drawn spinal fluid to check for menengitis. All this on such a tiny little body. Her face was puffy from the fluids they were pumping into her. She had so much congestion in her nose and head that she couldn't breathe laying on her back and she needed the comfort of being cradled close -- so we took turns holding her. They said she had RSV, an upper respiratory disease of young children especially and the flu that everyone else has had recently. She slept most of the night Saturday, waking up only once to be fed and then going back to sleep. I was very glad to be there and to be able to hold her.
This is the second time we've gotten a call saying that one of our grandkids was going to the hospital. I'm trying to figure out why that is "scarier" than when our own kids were sick? Maybe it's because there are two to be concerned about -- our child and our grandchild. Or maybe it's because we have absolutely no control over the situation and we are not intimately acquainted with all that is going on. We are not there to evaluate the situation on a moment by moment basis. And maybe also, God gives special grace to parents with sick children to be able to trust Him and handle it in a calm way for the sake of the child (and other children). I was so proud of Melody and the way she handled the whole thing. She did not "lose it" at all, but was calm and composed and trusting (the Lord). And Caleb was such excellent support and strength for them both.
They stayed in the hospital until Monday morning so they could get the results back from the 48-hour blood and spinal fluid cultures. I went today to help Melody with getting groceries and a few other odd jobs. They are doing fine. Julia is very glad to have all the tubes and monitors off and to have her hand back! And Ethan and Kylie are ready to get back to being a family again. (They stayed with Caleb's parents during the hospital stay.) I am so very thankful for the Lord's comfort and peace in these kinds of life experiences.

Washington D.C. Trip

This is for those of you who are visiting this site after reading our Christmas letter. I used just a few of our pictures. I chose ones with "us" in them rather than scenery, since everyone knows what Washington D.C. looks like. I hope you enjoy it!

Back from Washington

Well, we've been there and now we're back home. We had a wonderful visit! Thank you Micah and Allie for a memorable week of getting to know our grandson. We are looking forward to seeing you again very soon.

It's hard to have children and grandchildren so many miles away. But when I see how they love each other and how they are seeking to follow the Lord with all their hearts, I am content. I am blessed beyond measure to be part of this family!

New Grandson

By this time you all know that we have a new grandson. What a blessing! Kayla is out there right now spending time with Micah and Allie and "bonding" with her new nephew. I can't wait until time for us to go -- in how many days? Let's see . . . today is the 20th . . . until Nov. 6 . . . . 17 days. Scott asked me today what we were going to do all the time we were there. That answer was easy for me. I told him I was going to sit and rock my grandson! If I can figure it out, I will post a couple of pictures with this blog. Here goes . . .

(It didn't work -- kept getting an error message; Oh well)

Happy Anniversary!

My parents' 60th anniversary was last Thursday (Oct. 4). I put the following in our local paper in honor of the occasion.

"My parents', Chuck and Iva Burkitt, 60th anniversary is this week. I think that deserves special recognition. I am the oldest of eight children. Among us, we have 34 grandchildren. Our children are having children now, so the list of greatgrandchildren is growing.
I want to publicly thank them for the rock-solid foundation they gave us for our marriages and for life in general. They would be the first to tell you that it wasn't them, but the Lord who made the difference in our lives - and that is true. But it was their example and willingness to be used by Him that we saw on a daily basis.
I am still learning from their example. As they are getting older, they continue to display constant love and care for one another and they just enjoy being together as they always did. I hope Scott and I can grow old like that. They are living examples of the fruit of lifetime commitment carried over the long haul.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!